Post by couragebagge on Sept 1, 2005 20:10:29 GMT -5
T*K*O
(Starring: MrsPepper, Vic Romano, That Announcer, and D’Snowth)
Episode #: 10
Title: “A Change in Command”
Original Airdate: 26-Aug-2005
Written By: MrsPepper
Created By: MrsPepper
Guest stars: KermieBaby47, Vibs, and Beauregard
Special Muppet Guest Appearance By: Grover
Another typical morning at the 3976th ½. As usual, the thread killers were busy, doing of all things…killing threads. D’Snowth was monitoring them, Beauregard was cleaning unflushed toilets, and MrsPepper was on hold with Number One, of the 001st.
MRSPEPPER: (On hold)………………yes sir,……………EVERYONE?!................seriously?..... .............and you say this is mandatory?...................well all right, what time?.................Tomorrow morning?......................all right, I’ll be there…………………….yes sir,…………..see you there.
With that MrsPepper hung up, and pushed the button on here intercom.
MRSPEPPER: D’Snowth…
D’SNOWTH: (Over intercom)…yes MrsPepper?...
MRSPEPPER: …Would you please step into my office please?
D’SNOWTH: Yes ma’am. (Hangs up). Hoo-boy, the LAST time she called me into her office, she found that picture in my wallet. I need to try to reform!
Within seconds, D’Snowth entered the office of MrsPepper, who turned around in her chair to face him.
MRSPEPPER: Ah D’Snowth…
D’SNOWTH: (Cracks) HONEST! IT WASN’T ME! THEY’RE ALL LYIN’ I SWEAR! I DIDN’T TAPE THAT PIN-UP OF KATHY GREENWOOD IN THE MEN’S BATHROOM!
MRSPEPPER: Pin up of Kathy Greenwood in the men’s room? I KNEW you’d crack sometime, but to get to the point, I have to appear at the presidents’ club meeting tomorrow with some of the other presidents of other T*K*O units, so since you’re second in command, tomorrow, you’ll be in charge. Any questions?
D’SNOWTH: Am I in trouble?
MRSPEPPER: If you get that pin-down that pin-up this minute, you WILL be!
With that, D’Snowth ran out of the office, as MrsPepper nodded in satisfaction. Later that night in the conference room…
VIC ROMANO: …well, I believe I can safely say that tonight has been a successful night for thread killings. Now all we have to do is avoid this new anti-thread killing group, but other than that, we’re gold! Now then…
Before Vic could finish, MrsPepper and D’Snowth entered the office.
MRSPEPPER: Excuse me for interrupting Vic.
VIC ROMANO: Not at all madam president!
MRSPEPPER: Thank you. (Clears throat) Lady, and gentlemen, tomorrow, I have to appear before the other T*K*O presidents for a very important meeting, so while I’m away, D’Snowth will be in charge, and I know I can trust him keep order and discipline around here, right D’Snowth?
D’SNOWTH: (Nervous) Oh yeah.
MRSPEPPER: Great! Okay Vic, you may carry on.
Early the next morning, the thread killers were in their offices, waiting for Vic, who was waiting for D’Snowth, as was MrsPepper. MrsPepper paced back and forth in the lounge, and constant glancing at the clock. She feared that she would soon be late for her meeting until, D’Snowth showed up. BUT D’Snowth was different today, he showed up in a striped suit, with shiny black dress shoes, and a big panama with the purple hat ban.
MRSPEPPER: It’s about time you got here Mr. Menjou! Now remember, you may have my permission to make drastic calls, including pay-cuts, or even canning someone, BUT you do not have my permission to give anyone a raise. Is that clear?
D’SNOWTH: Crystal!
MRSPEPPER: Excellent! I knew I could count on you! But before I go, I need to give you something…
With that, MrsPepper pulled out of her purse, The Ring of Fifty Keys. The sacred key ring, that MrsPepper kept for herself. The Ring of Fifty Keys, is used by MrsPepper to unlock every door in the building…TWICE! She handed them to D’Snowth.
MRSPEPPER: Make me proud D’Snowth!
With that, MrsPepper walked out of the building, and to the parking lot, where she got into her car and drove off. With that, D’Snowth rushed to the men’s room, changed into his normal clothes, ran back to his office.
VIC ROMANO: It’s about time you got here, I need those files right away, so the thread killers can get to killing threads….did you hear me (my last name has been removed)?
D’SNOWTH: (Turns on intercom) Attention, all personnel, this your C.F.O., who has been promoted to C.E.O. for the day…since I am in charge today, I say free day for all! That is all!
With that, the thread killers threw their papers up into the air in excitement.
Commercial break.
Later that day, a grumpy Beauregard was cleaning up a huge mess of playing cards, milk cartons, and Muppet action figures everywhere! Meanwhile, in the lunch room, everyone seemed to be enjoying themselves at the “party”; cookies, milk, and iced tea everywhere, and The Muppet Show Season 1 playing. As all of this was going on, the thread killers were enjoying a performance of D’Snowth, giving some of his impressions.
D’SNOWTH: (As Father Mulcahy from M*A*S*H)…and I say to you my children, this jocularity is most unseemly…
Everyone applauded, and asked for more.
D’SNOWTH: All right, see if you can who this is…(As Paul Lynde) Martha, get me a martini!
More applause came from the thread killers, as Vic stood up, and tapped a milk carton with a fork.
VIC ROMANO: And now, ladies and gerbils, it’s time for the moment no one has been waiting for…the MrsPepper sound alike contest! (Unrealistically MrsPepper)…Vic Romano, how dare you skive off your duties!
Big applause came, as Vic pointed to That Announcer for the next impression.
THAT ANNOUNCER: (With phony feminine voice) This is a thread killing organization, YOU are thread killers, so you should be killing threads!
More applause as Vic pointed to KermieBaby47 for the next impression.
KERMIEBABY47: (Also with phony feminine voice) There’s work to be done, and threads to by killed!
More applause as Vic called on Vibs for an impression.
VIBS: (In high-pitched voice) This is not joke killing time, this is thread killing time!
More applause as Vic called on D’Snowth for the last impression.
D’SNOWTH: (Close, but with phony Canadian accent) I run a pretty tight shift around here, eh? That’s what it’s all a-boot, eh?
And so, as the applause went on, a sour-puss Beauregard entered the cafeteria, and towards his broom closet.
VIC ROMANO: Hey Gardy, c’mon join us!
BEAUREGARD: No! No thank you!
THAT ANNOUNCER: Aw, why not? We’re having lots of fun!
BEAUREGARD: Yeah, “fun” for you, but not for me, you guys have left such a big mess, I’ve had to work double-time today! Besides, if MrsPepper gave a party like this, it wouldn’t be this chaotic!
Beauregard paused, and stormed out of the cafeteria, as the thread killers continued watching the “Sandy Duncan” episode. As time went by, D’Snowth stood up on the table and called out.
D’SNOWTH: May I have your attention? Your attention please! Thank you, as we prepare to come to the half-way point of our very fun party, I have prepared a special treat for you all, and so, without further to do, may I present our special guest, Grover!
Cheers and applauds went on, as Grover popped up from behind the table.
GROVER: Hello everybodeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee! Ah-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha! Oh, what a fun party it looks like you are having! I hope you don’t mind having a little furry and cute blue monster as the life of the party, hmm?
Everyone then started chanting for Grover to continue!
GROVER: Well then, let’s get this party started! How about a sing-a-long?! (Looks up towards ceiling) Hit it Charles! (Monster in the Mirror begins to play) Saw a monster in the mirror when I woked today/a monster in my mirror but I did not run away/I did not shed a tear or hide beneath my bed/so the monster looked at me, and this is what he said/he said “wubba wubba wubba wubba woo-woo-woo!”/”A-wubba wubba wubba and a doodely-do!”/”he said “wubba wubba wubba”, so I said it too/do not wubba me or I will wubba you!
OTHERS: Do not wubba me or I will wubba you!
As Grover continued with his sing-a-long, D’Snowth heard the phone ring from his office. With that, he left the cafeteria, walked down the hallway, and into his office, where he picked up the phone.
D’SNOWTH: 3976th ½, T*K*O, D’Snowth speaking…
MRSPEPPER: (Over phone) Hello D’Snowth, this is MrsPepper, our meeting was finished early today, so I’m on my way back to the office right now to relieve you of your duty, because I’m sure it’s been a hard day for you hasn’t it?
D’SNOWTH: (Trying to sound convincing) Oh yes, I’ve had a very long and hard day today…
MRSPEPPER: (Over phone) Well, don’t worry, I’m leaving the meeting right now, and should be back within the next 15 minutes. See you there.
With that, D’Snowth hung up, panicked, and ran back to the cafeteria. In the cafeteria, everyone was getting ready to sing the final chorus of “Monster in the Mirror”, when…
D’SNOWTH: GUYS! (Starts huffing and puffing) IjustgotoffthephonewithMrsPepperhermeetingendedear lyandshesonherwaybackandwillbehereinfifteenminutes wegottagetthisplacecleanedup!!!!!!!!!!
With that, the thread killers screamed in fear, as they cleaned up the cafeteria as fast as they could, to the amusement of Beauregard. Everyone was picking up milk cartons, empty iced tea glasses, action figures, playing cards, you name it. Grover disappeared, Vic Romano took out the DVD, and hid the television set back in the supply closet where D’Snowth got it out in the first place, D’Snowth ran back into the men’s room, ripped down the new pin-up of Elizabeth Montgomery, and started to change back into his suit. Meanwhile, back in the cafeteria…
VIC ROMANO: So much for our party, this quick clean up is wearing me out! Now where’s the 8 of clubs?
THAT ANNOUNCER: Has anyone seen my Sam the Eagle figure?
KERMIEBABY47: Who drinks this much milk?!
VIBS: Where’s my joke book?!
Suddenly, D’Snowth came bursting into the cafeteria again, this time in his fancy suit.
D’SNOWTH: HURRY UP, MRSPEPPER WILL BE HERE IN 5 MORE MINUTES WE GOTTA HURRY!
So the thread killers rushed through their clean up even faster. The cafeteria was finally cleaned up, BUT, there was still a mess in the conference room and lobby, so every hurried to get that cleaned up. Once that was done, the thread killers took a quick little breather, but they heard a car door shut.
D’SNOWTH: SHE’S BACK, QUICK, EVERYONE BACK TO YOUR STATIONS, AND ACT LIKE YOU’VE BEEN KILLING THREADS ALL DAY!
THAT ANNOUNCER: WE DON’T HAVE OUR PAPER WORK!
D’SNOWTH: GET YOUR FILES OUT OF MY OFFICE, AND SPREAD THEM AROUND YOUR DESKS TO MAKE IT LOOK REAL!
So they did, they grabbed their files, spread them around their desks, logged onto Muppet Central, and acted like they were killing threads all day. D’Snowth ran back into MrsPepper’s office, and lied on the couch to make it seem like he’s had a long, frustrating day. Within seconds of all that, MrsPepper entered the building. She strolled down the hallway, and was pleased to see how well the thread killers were killing threads. With that, she strolled into her office to find D’Snowth on her couch.
MRSPEPPER: D’Snowth, everything’s running so smoothly! Who knows, maybe one day you’ll be fit to be an actual C.E.O. Well, I’ll be relieving you of your duty, so you may take that suit off now.
D’SNOWTH: (Pooped) I was hoping you’d say that ma’am!
Commercial break.
Later that evening, MrsPepper held a conference. Everyone looked like they just got out of bed, they were so exhausted.
MRSPEPPER: Well, I must say, everything looks like they ran so smoothly today. Now I don’t know about you all, but I must say I was impressed with D’Snowth’s leadership today. Why don’t we all give him a round of applause!
While MrsPepper clapped her hands to death, everyone else barely clapped. MrsPepper noticed.
MRSPEPPER: Wow, you all must’ve had a hard, long day today with thread killings. Well, I believe I know just what you all need…
Everyone then started to perk up.
VIC ROMANO: A raise?
MRSPEPPER: No.
THAT ANNOUNCER: More iced tea at lunch?
MRSPEPPER: Nope.
KERMIEBABY47 AND VIBS: Up-to-date computers?
MRSPEPPER: Uh-Uh!
D’SNOWTH: Then what?
MRSPEPPER: A free day with a party!
Everyone then passed out from hearing that, which really confused MrsPepper.
MRSPEPPER: What’s that all about?
BEAUREGARD: (Passing by) I think they poop out at parties, heh-heh!
THE END
(Starring: MrsPepper, Vic Romano, That Announcer, and D’Snowth)
Episode #: 10
Title: “A Change in Command”
Original Airdate: 26-Aug-2005
Written By: MrsPepper
Created By: MrsPepper
Guest stars: KermieBaby47, Vibs, and Beauregard
Special Muppet Guest Appearance By: Grover
Another typical morning at the 3976th ½. As usual, the thread killers were busy, doing of all things…killing threads. D’Snowth was monitoring them, Beauregard was cleaning unflushed toilets, and MrsPepper was on hold with Number One, of the 001st.
MRSPEPPER: (On hold)………………yes sir,……………EVERYONE?!................seriously?..... .............and you say this is mandatory?...................well all right, what time?.................Tomorrow morning?......................all right, I’ll be there…………………….yes sir,…………..see you there.
With that MrsPepper hung up, and pushed the button on here intercom.
MRSPEPPER: D’Snowth…
D’SNOWTH: (Over intercom)…yes MrsPepper?...
MRSPEPPER: …Would you please step into my office please?
D’SNOWTH: Yes ma’am. (Hangs up). Hoo-boy, the LAST time she called me into her office, she found that picture in my wallet. I need to try to reform!
Within seconds, D’Snowth entered the office of MrsPepper, who turned around in her chair to face him.
MRSPEPPER: Ah D’Snowth…
D’SNOWTH: (Cracks) HONEST! IT WASN’T ME! THEY’RE ALL LYIN’ I SWEAR! I DIDN’T TAPE THAT PIN-UP OF KATHY GREENWOOD IN THE MEN’S BATHROOM!
MRSPEPPER: Pin up of Kathy Greenwood in the men’s room? I KNEW you’d crack sometime, but to get to the point, I have to appear at the presidents’ club meeting tomorrow with some of the other presidents of other T*K*O units, so since you’re second in command, tomorrow, you’ll be in charge. Any questions?
D’SNOWTH: Am I in trouble?
MRSPEPPER: If you get that pin-down that pin-up this minute, you WILL be!
With that, D’Snowth ran out of the office, as MrsPepper nodded in satisfaction. Later that night in the conference room…
VIC ROMANO: …well, I believe I can safely say that tonight has been a successful night for thread killings. Now all we have to do is avoid this new anti-thread killing group, but other than that, we’re gold! Now then…
Before Vic could finish, MrsPepper and D’Snowth entered the office.
MRSPEPPER: Excuse me for interrupting Vic.
VIC ROMANO: Not at all madam president!
MRSPEPPER: Thank you. (Clears throat) Lady, and gentlemen, tomorrow, I have to appear before the other T*K*O presidents for a very important meeting, so while I’m away, D’Snowth will be in charge, and I know I can trust him keep order and discipline around here, right D’Snowth?
D’SNOWTH: (Nervous) Oh yeah.
MRSPEPPER: Great! Okay Vic, you may carry on.
Early the next morning, the thread killers were in their offices, waiting for Vic, who was waiting for D’Snowth, as was MrsPepper. MrsPepper paced back and forth in the lounge, and constant glancing at the clock. She feared that she would soon be late for her meeting until, D’Snowth showed up. BUT D’Snowth was different today, he showed up in a striped suit, with shiny black dress shoes, and a big panama with the purple hat ban.
MRSPEPPER: It’s about time you got here Mr. Menjou! Now remember, you may have my permission to make drastic calls, including pay-cuts, or even canning someone, BUT you do not have my permission to give anyone a raise. Is that clear?
D’SNOWTH: Crystal!
MRSPEPPER: Excellent! I knew I could count on you! But before I go, I need to give you something…
With that, MrsPepper pulled out of her purse, The Ring of Fifty Keys. The sacred key ring, that MrsPepper kept for herself. The Ring of Fifty Keys, is used by MrsPepper to unlock every door in the building…TWICE! She handed them to D’Snowth.
MRSPEPPER: Make me proud D’Snowth!
With that, MrsPepper walked out of the building, and to the parking lot, where she got into her car and drove off. With that, D’Snowth rushed to the men’s room, changed into his normal clothes, ran back to his office.
VIC ROMANO: It’s about time you got here, I need those files right away, so the thread killers can get to killing threads….did you hear me (my last name has been removed)?
D’SNOWTH: (Turns on intercom) Attention, all personnel, this your C.F.O., who has been promoted to C.E.O. for the day…since I am in charge today, I say free day for all! That is all!
With that, the thread killers threw their papers up into the air in excitement.
Commercial break.
Later that day, a grumpy Beauregard was cleaning up a huge mess of playing cards, milk cartons, and Muppet action figures everywhere! Meanwhile, in the lunch room, everyone seemed to be enjoying themselves at the “party”; cookies, milk, and iced tea everywhere, and The Muppet Show Season 1 playing. As all of this was going on, the thread killers were enjoying a performance of D’Snowth, giving some of his impressions.
D’SNOWTH: (As Father Mulcahy from M*A*S*H)…and I say to you my children, this jocularity is most unseemly…
Everyone applauded, and asked for more.
D’SNOWTH: All right, see if you can who this is…(As Paul Lynde) Martha, get me a martini!
More applause came from the thread killers, as Vic stood up, and tapped a milk carton with a fork.
VIC ROMANO: And now, ladies and gerbils, it’s time for the moment no one has been waiting for…the MrsPepper sound alike contest! (Unrealistically MrsPepper)…Vic Romano, how dare you skive off your duties!
Big applause came, as Vic pointed to That Announcer for the next impression.
THAT ANNOUNCER: (With phony feminine voice) This is a thread killing organization, YOU are thread killers, so you should be killing threads!
More applause as Vic pointed to KermieBaby47 for the next impression.
KERMIEBABY47: (Also with phony feminine voice) There’s work to be done, and threads to by killed!
More applause as Vic called on Vibs for an impression.
VIBS: (In high-pitched voice) This is not joke killing time, this is thread killing time!
More applause as Vic called on D’Snowth for the last impression.
D’SNOWTH: (Close, but with phony Canadian accent) I run a pretty tight shift around here, eh? That’s what it’s all a-boot, eh?
And so, as the applause went on, a sour-puss Beauregard entered the cafeteria, and towards his broom closet.
VIC ROMANO: Hey Gardy, c’mon join us!
BEAUREGARD: No! No thank you!
THAT ANNOUNCER: Aw, why not? We’re having lots of fun!
BEAUREGARD: Yeah, “fun” for you, but not for me, you guys have left such a big mess, I’ve had to work double-time today! Besides, if MrsPepper gave a party like this, it wouldn’t be this chaotic!
Beauregard paused, and stormed out of the cafeteria, as the thread killers continued watching the “Sandy Duncan” episode. As time went by, D’Snowth stood up on the table and called out.
D’SNOWTH: May I have your attention? Your attention please! Thank you, as we prepare to come to the half-way point of our very fun party, I have prepared a special treat for you all, and so, without further to do, may I present our special guest, Grover!
Cheers and applauds went on, as Grover popped up from behind the table.
GROVER: Hello everybodeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee! Ah-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha! Oh, what a fun party it looks like you are having! I hope you don’t mind having a little furry and cute blue monster as the life of the party, hmm?
Everyone then started chanting for Grover to continue!
GROVER: Well then, let’s get this party started! How about a sing-a-long?! (Looks up towards ceiling) Hit it Charles! (Monster in the Mirror begins to play) Saw a monster in the mirror when I woked today/a monster in my mirror but I did not run away/I did not shed a tear or hide beneath my bed/so the monster looked at me, and this is what he said/he said “wubba wubba wubba wubba woo-woo-woo!”/”A-wubba wubba wubba and a doodely-do!”/”he said “wubba wubba wubba”, so I said it too/do not wubba me or I will wubba you!
OTHERS: Do not wubba me or I will wubba you!
As Grover continued with his sing-a-long, D’Snowth heard the phone ring from his office. With that, he left the cafeteria, walked down the hallway, and into his office, where he picked up the phone.
D’SNOWTH: 3976th ½, T*K*O, D’Snowth speaking…
MRSPEPPER: (Over phone) Hello D’Snowth, this is MrsPepper, our meeting was finished early today, so I’m on my way back to the office right now to relieve you of your duty, because I’m sure it’s been a hard day for you hasn’t it?
D’SNOWTH: (Trying to sound convincing) Oh yes, I’ve had a very long and hard day today…
MRSPEPPER: (Over phone) Well, don’t worry, I’m leaving the meeting right now, and should be back within the next 15 minutes. See you there.
With that, D’Snowth hung up, panicked, and ran back to the cafeteria. In the cafeteria, everyone was getting ready to sing the final chorus of “Monster in the Mirror”, when…
D’SNOWTH: GUYS! (Starts huffing and puffing) IjustgotoffthephonewithMrsPepperhermeetingendedear lyandshesonherwaybackandwillbehereinfifteenminutes wegottagetthisplacecleanedup!!!!!!!!!!
With that, the thread killers screamed in fear, as they cleaned up the cafeteria as fast as they could, to the amusement of Beauregard. Everyone was picking up milk cartons, empty iced tea glasses, action figures, playing cards, you name it. Grover disappeared, Vic Romano took out the DVD, and hid the television set back in the supply closet where D’Snowth got it out in the first place, D’Snowth ran back into the men’s room, ripped down the new pin-up of Elizabeth Montgomery, and started to change back into his suit. Meanwhile, back in the cafeteria…
VIC ROMANO: So much for our party, this quick clean up is wearing me out! Now where’s the 8 of clubs?
THAT ANNOUNCER: Has anyone seen my Sam the Eagle figure?
KERMIEBABY47: Who drinks this much milk?!
VIBS: Where’s my joke book?!
Suddenly, D’Snowth came bursting into the cafeteria again, this time in his fancy suit.
D’SNOWTH: HURRY UP, MRSPEPPER WILL BE HERE IN 5 MORE MINUTES WE GOTTA HURRY!
So the thread killers rushed through their clean up even faster. The cafeteria was finally cleaned up, BUT, there was still a mess in the conference room and lobby, so every hurried to get that cleaned up. Once that was done, the thread killers took a quick little breather, but they heard a car door shut.
D’SNOWTH: SHE’S BACK, QUICK, EVERYONE BACK TO YOUR STATIONS, AND ACT LIKE YOU’VE BEEN KILLING THREADS ALL DAY!
THAT ANNOUNCER: WE DON’T HAVE OUR PAPER WORK!
D’SNOWTH: GET YOUR FILES OUT OF MY OFFICE, AND SPREAD THEM AROUND YOUR DESKS TO MAKE IT LOOK REAL!
So they did, they grabbed their files, spread them around their desks, logged onto Muppet Central, and acted like they were killing threads all day. D’Snowth ran back into MrsPepper’s office, and lied on the couch to make it seem like he’s had a long, frustrating day. Within seconds of all that, MrsPepper entered the building. She strolled down the hallway, and was pleased to see how well the thread killers were killing threads. With that, she strolled into her office to find D’Snowth on her couch.
MRSPEPPER: D’Snowth, everything’s running so smoothly! Who knows, maybe one day you’ll be fit to be an actual C.E.O. Well, I’ll be relieving you of your duty, so you may take that suit off now.
D’SNOWTH: (Pooped) I was hoping you’d say that ma’am!
Commercial break.
Later that evening, MrsPepper held a conference. Everyone looked like they just got out of bed, they were so exhausted.
MRSPEPPER: Well, I must say, everything looks like they ran so smoothly today. Now I don’t know about you all, but I must say I was impressed with D’Snowth’s leadership today. Why don’t we all give him a round of applause!
While MrsPepper clapped her hands to death, everyone else barely clapped. MrsPepper noticed.
MRSPEPPER: Wow, you all must’ve had a hard, long day today with thread killings. Well, I believe I know just what you all need…
Everyone then started to perk up.
VIC ROMANO: A raise?
MRSPEPPER: No.
THAT ANNOUNCER: More iced tea at lunch?
MRSPEPPER: Nope.
KERMIEBABY47 AND VIBS: Up-to-date computers?
MRSPEPPER: Uh-Uh!
D’SNOWTH: Then what?
MRSPEPPER: A free day with a party!
Everyone then passed out from hearing that, which really confused MrsPepper.
MRSPEPPER: What’s that all about?
BEAUREGARD: (Passing by) I think they poop out at parties, heh-heh!
THE END